This is for all the moms out there...especially those who deal with the blessings of a strong-willed child. It is a blessing that God would choose to grow us in this way...because if you not growing because of your little blessing then you are probably going to be in the pit of despair or just yanking your hair out. Yep, i guarentee it!
Today is my beautiful baby boy's official 5th birthday...and it started off rough and though I gave enough grace and mercy as i could...the behavior continued to spiral into an all out spiritual battle(although I thought it was just a mommy/son battle, it was much more) and completely uncontrollable. What in the world happened today? I feel as though I made appropriate decision and appropriate disciplines at the right time with the right feelings. I disciplined out of love, I controlled my anger, I prayed, I called a friend to pray, i called kevin to pray and for advice....and nothing....ABSOLUTELY nothing was going to turn this day around...
The reflection of the day still baffles me which is why I can conclude the spiritual battle.....but I am still so blessed and thankful...for one thing....i made it...i mean i survived it. Today was a blessing because I spend time with my Lord, and time with my kids(despite all the conflict there were still good cuddle/reading/learning moments)....so why do i feel so discouraged?
Here is the other thing....the part i am a bit jealous over...the part that just doesn't seem fair...yet I took it with open arms and gratefulness.....DADDY came home to my rescue. He was fresh meat and ready to be daddy and husband after a full days work...He held me close, I cried in his arms...and then he took over. He is hero to my boys and to me. He kinda knew what we all needed.....a little love and some male bonding(wrestling)with the little ones.
I wish I knew what to change about this day to make it different....
I wish i knew what sparked the behavior.....
All I can do is pray for strength for tomorrow....to look at my children as Jesus does....to spend time in HiS Word....pray that the authority and peace of Christ will rule in our home...
Thank you Lord for the good times to enjoy and the not so good times to reflect and use as a means of change in my life and heart.
Lamentations 3:22-23
Because of the LORD'S great love we are NOT CONSUMED, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
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